There are two episodes that usually crown the "Worst of" list for
Miami Vice: "
Missing Hours" and "Cows of October." Both, unsurprisingly, are in the fourth season. To be 100% honest, I would just put "Missing Hours" here, too, because it definitely fits the bill as the worst episode, and I genuinely enjoy "Cows of October," kind of like how I love "
Bad Eggs" from
Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I know it's terrible - and God, is it terrible - but it's at least
fun. I cannot say the same for "Missing Hours," however, even if James Brown is featured as an alien involved in a secret government project.
Okay, here's the basic setup: a rancher has bull semen that will produce big cows and people, supposedly Communists from Cuba, are wanting to steal that semen. Hijinks ensue. At the end of the episode, it turns out that this was all a scam by the rancher, who is actually just a conman.
Yes, this was an actual episode of
Miami Vice. It was dumb, goofy, and dammit, it was entertaining. But it is bad. At least in "Missing Hours," it
kind of maintained the nature of
Miami Vice. Sure, it may have ended in a "it was all just a dream ... or
was it?" way ... God, I can't even do this. Both episodes are terrible, and no matter how fun "Cows of October" may or may not be, it's just as godawful as "Missing Hours." So they tie as the worst episode of
Miami Vice.
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